When I start something new, my mind immediately starts setting bigger goals than originally planned.

If I workout one day my mind suddenly says, “I am going to workout 5 days a week FOREVER!!!”

I take it to an unnecessary level, and often get discouraged when I don’t meet this new extravagant goal.

But, I am trying to get better at this, and substitute teaching is giving me practice.

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When I got my first substitute job back in December 2020, I immediately ditched my “once a week” plan and said yes to every job that came up at their school.

I loved feeling needed, busy, and productive. And I genuinely love the work.

But I began to feel all my “yes” affect our pace.

Household things I would normally get done in a week weren’t getting done.

My kids were running on fumes by the end of the week from going to early bird drop off.

I wanted to slow it down, but saying “no” felt like letting people down. I was torn.

Then I had a moment of clarity one evening.

A job popped up in the evening hours and I was heading to bed when I saw the post.

I had worked that day and coached soccer. I was spent. My mind didn’t feel ready to switch gears to work mode.

I started asking myself what I couldn’t/wouldn’t do if I took that job the next day:

• Walk with Kevin in the morning
• Coffee shop to write
• Let kids sleep in
• Clean
• Meal prep
• Trip prep

The list quickly outweighed the extra money I would make, because you cannot buy pace.

I had always prided myself on our family pace. Suddenly it became clear I had said yes to more work and more money, and I needed to say yes to a slower pace.

So I didn’t take that sub job.

It went against all my instincts to please.

I didn’t get to be the “hero” for the school that day.

But I DID get to be the hero for my family.

-Brittany