When I start something new, my mind immediately starts setting bigger goals than originally planned.
If I workout one day my mind suddenly says, “I am going to workout 5 days a week FOREVER!!!”
I take it to an unnecessary level, and often get discouraged when I don’t meet this new extravagant goal.
But, I am trying to get better at this, and substitute teaching is giving me practice.
When I got my first substitute job back in December 2020, I immediately ditched my “once a week” plan and said yes to every job that came up at their school.
I loved feeling needed, busy, and productive. And I genuinely love the work.
But I began to feel all my “yes” affect our pace.
Household things I would normally get done in a week weren’t getting done.
My kids were running on fumes by the end of the week from going to early bird drop off.
I wanted to slow it down, but saying “no” felt like letting people down. I was torn.
Then I had a moment of clarity one evening.
A job popped up in the evening hours and I was heading to bed when I saw the post.
I had worked that day and coached soccer. I was spent. My mind didn’t feel ready to switch gears to work mode.
I started asking myself what I couldn’t/wouldn’t do if I took that job the next day:
- Walk with Kevin in the morning
- Coffee shop to write
- Let kids sleep in
- Meal prep
- Trip prep
The list quickly outweighed the extra money I would make, because you cannot buy pace.
I had always prided myself on our family pace. Suddenly it became clear I had said yes to more work and more money, and I needed to say yes to a slower pace.
So I didn’t take that sub job.
It went against all my instincts to please.
I didn’t get to be the “hero” for the school that day.
But I DID get to be the hero for my family.
Amazing writing! I find myself constantly torn between good decisions on how to use our most precious resource of time, thanks for sharing!
I was so happy to see you are writing again! I just binge read your last 6 posts
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